As I get further along in my pregnancy this topic is really playing on my mind, every time I speak to someone about being pregnant I feel the first thing they ask me is are you having a c-section again? My honest answer is I really don’t know. As most of you are probably aware I had a traumatic birth with my first which led to both of our lives being in danger – we were rushed into theatre and I was put to sleep to have a Cat 1 C Section. I had a placenta abruption which is where the placenta detaches from the uterus, this can be dangerous for the baby as it can cause the baby to be deprived of oxygen and nutrients and the bleeding is dangerous for the mother.
I am so unsure as to whether to have an elective c-section or try for a VBAC (vaginal birth after c-section). I really struggled after Bea’s birth as I felt like I failed by having a c-section especially as I was asleep when it happened and I didn’t see my baby come in to the world. The one thing I want in this world is to be able to have a natural, calm, water birth however the health of my baby and me is the most important thing. I have switched hospitals for this pregnancy as I was worried that my PTSD would trigger if I went back to the same hospital that Bea was born in and we have also moved closer to Frimley Park Hospital which has amazing reviews for their maternity unit.
I am now 24 weeks pregnant and have had a relatively nice pregnancy, I’ve had morning sickness and lost my appetite but apart from that it’s been a good pregnancy. At all my scans the baby has been healthy and my placenta is looking good which is really positive, I am consultant and midwife led which means that I see my midwife mostly but I have a couple of appointments with during the pregnancy. I saw my consultant at 12 weeks and they said that as long as my pregnancy goes smoothly and everyone is happy that I can have a natural birth however I will be having another appointment and scan at 34 weeks to make sure this is still the case. If I get pre-eclampsia in this pregnancy which I did with Bea then I will most likely be induced, I am taking aspirin everyday to try and prevent this happening as I really do not want to be induced again.
I think if I get told I need to be induced then I will be asking for a c-section as I believe this could really trigger my PTSD and I want to try and be as calm as possible during my labour/delivery. I really want to try and have a natural birth however I am so worried that I will have to have another emergency c-section under general and I won’t be able to witness either of my baby’s being born. I know the likeliness of this happening is really slim but it’s things like this that really play on my mind.
I really want to try hypnobirthing but I am worried that I will have to have a planned c section and the hypnobirthing would have been a waste of time and money. I believe that hypnobirthing do cater for c-section births as well though so this is definitely something I am going to look into more as I think it will help with keeping me calm during my last couple of weeks when I know I am going to be a nervous wreck.
If anyone has any good/bad stories about VBAC’s or elective c-sections please send me a message, I am so interested to know people’s experiences. I would also love to hear from anyone who used hypnobirthing in their pregnancys and found it useful or not.